Thursday, 2 December 2010

Is Robert Mugabwe Belgian?

Belgian elegance...
In London we have "rush hour", here in Brussels its more of a "shuffle time", especially on the Metro.

I actually like the Brussels metro - being a bit "green" I try to use public transport as much as I can, and with this city being about the size of Croydon it is easy to get about quickly. But mornings are awful, due to the overcrowding.

Belgian men smell of beer in the mornings, and the chicks smell of stale tobacco and strange perfume. Try standing in a carriage with 150 of them and see how you feel about that. But the worst thing is the depressing Belgian dress sense. Various shades of drab, set off nicely with a little tuft of hair growing from the bottom lip. And thats just the women....

If you want eye candy on the way to work in the mornings, I recommend London in springtime, Moscow in the winter, and Paris anytime. In this respect, Brussels does not work for me at all.

So I was delighted to attend a fashion show last night, hosted by the EU Belarus Business Chamber at a beautiful chateau on the outskirts of the city. I never paid attention to such things before, but this was great!

I am quite a fan of Belarus - its a terrific place, and Minsk is one of the "must see" cities. But what puzzles me is how an entire nation can be held back by one man - President Lukashenko. The moment he is gone, Belarus will be allowed to rejoin the rest of the world, but still he hangs on, like a European version of Robert Mugabwe, which brings us back to the subject of unpleasant people with dodgy facial hair.


  1. Talking of strange smells in public places.

    I was going to a shared dinner by bus and decided to take along a home made cauiflower cheese. I came across a novel recipe that suggested using Blue Cheese instead of Cheddar.

    Well, you all know how blue cheese pongs when you take it out of the fridge. Imagine, therefore the smell when it comes out of the oven piping hot!

    I was sitting on the bus minding my own business with my hot blue cauliflower cheese in a pyrex dish covered with foil, when the bus driver stopped the bus and yelled out "What's that stink?". Always one for admitting my errors, I raised my hand and said, "I think it's me!", I said, "I've made cauliflower cheese with blue cheese and I think it's a bit too strong ...".

    The driver gave me an ultimatum. "I'm not moving this bus, till you get off this bus with your cauliflower cheese".

    Shamed, I sheepishly crept off the bus, cauliflower cheese in hand. My confidence shattered, I did not attend the dinner with my friends, but found a dustbin and poured all the stinking cauliflower into it.

  2. You don't like the smell of 'strange perfume'.

    Yes, you and other men too.

    Once, I got into a taxi wearing a new, I admit fairly strong (but I thought) pleasant perfume. No sooner had I fasened my seat belt, than the taxi driver wound down his window and sniffing with disgust asked, "What's that your wearing"? I told him. Being a Yorkshire man he came straight to the point, "Bloudy stinks!!

    Experence has taught me a little goes a long way. It is very easy for us women to get carried away with ourselves and spray left and right, down and centre, up and down and so overwhelm ourselves with our perfume, thereby causing a coughing fit and a sudden severe headache.

    Wisdom says, less is more. How true.

  3. I don't know what it is about me, but I seem to attract smelly under washed men whenever I travel by bus or choose to sit down on a public seat.

    I am like a magnet to them. My friends say it is because I look kind. I have speculated whether it is just that God wants to teach me endurance and charity.

    As soon as a filthy looking man steps onto a bus, I know he'll head with his smelly odour that precedes him, to me and he always does. He sits unaware of his foul odour and the smell of wee wee and what not assaults me like an exploding toilet. It's awful!!

    Being of a charitable Christian nature I am in conflict. Should I stay (like Jesus) in my seat long sufferingly, enduring the overwhelming odours or should I say "excuse me" and move.

    I'm sorry to say that as the years have gone on I have resorted to the latter more often than not.

    It is a sad fact, but there has definitely been an increase of men who for one reason or other are not able or unwilling to look after themselves properly. This combined with obesity, which neccessitates excellent hygiene has made matters worse.

    Travelling by pubic transport might be the 'greener' option, but not when the people you have to sit with stink so badly, you find yourself actually turning an unhealthy looking green yourself it's no picnic.